For The Love Of All Things UNstressful

In and effort to de stress today I thought it might be a good idea to take Ellen (who's here for the weekend) and Tanya out to one of our favorite Chinese restaurants. She's been working on the venue, that debuts this weekend, and hasn't had much breathing time. This however turned out to be the worst idea for relaxing that I have ever had.

We had between 12 and 1 o'clock. Keep this in mind or nothing that follows will make sense.

I get a phone call from stressed Tanya at 12. She's quickly running out of time before she has to be on a movie shoot at one. I told her we could forget lunch but this, to her, was unthinkable. So after doing some running around with her we finally leave at about 12:30. I had grabbed a trusty menu from the girls dorm lobby (yes it is a Southern favorite as well) and had called in the order. Well, more like fought with the person on the other line who got completely stuck on the words ADD TOFU!

When we arrived they hadn't heard of us, except we didn't figure this out until we had sat there for 10 minutes. It's now ten til one. No food. We're a bit upset. So they apologize and give us some vittles as fast as possible. We start scarfing it down in between phone calls. Tanya's trying to work out me picking up lights for the venue. We have to get them by 1:15. And then I get the phone call from and angry Asian lady. "you're order is ready!??!? HELLO! are you going to come get it?" I had ordered from another restaurant. Shoot me in the head and call me a retard. Not feeling that it was right to cancel the order, I jumped in the car at 12:55.

Suddenly Sparky the four cylinder became Rambo the race car...only with four cylinders... But he put out a valiant effort UNTIL I got stuck behind someone who insisted on going 20 under. Picture me screaming in desperation, poor Sparky's steering wheel getting the brunt of the fight.

After paying for the food, angry lady informs me she'd given away part of my food so I'd have to wait. SPARE ME! it's one o'clock, Tanya's late, I'm gonna die.

At 1:17 I pull back into the first restaurant grab the girls and crawl back to Southern through the mobs of veggie food lovers that are hitting up the VM. We've passed our deadline for the lights we can't find the people we were trying to get a hold of and I now have TONS of Chinese food and quite a bit less money in my pocket.

To make a long story short, this kind of activity continued throughout the rest of the afternoon. Yes relaxation was a TOTAL NEGATOR... Oh for the love of all things good. The world is against me, I just know it