People say that getting old is awful because you feel like you're losing your mind. What if I've already lost it?The other day I made it all the way out to my car before I realized that the merchandise in my hand had not been paid for. Dodging the steel bars that now seemed to be everywhere, I successfully made it back into the store to pay for my crime without being noticed by a single person... Apparently it's really easy to steal, but don't try this at home. Maybe my angels just made me invisible for a bit so I could have my senior moment at 22.
Furthermore, being senile can go hand in hand with 20/20 vision. You know you have a problem when your roommate refuses to move her desk over for optimum space inhabitation because she knows you'll kill yourself if she does it. Let me explain. According to her, I hit either the corner protruding towards the desk, her sitting at the desk, or the desk, most every time I walk by. I didn't really feel that this was fair, but upon her role play of the event in every possible situation, I had to admit it did look extremely like me. And.... well.... yesterday I ran into something both coming in the room and leaving it. She felt the need to give a rather hearty "I told you so." I just nursed my throbbing body parts and pretended as if it was the wall's fault.I really don't understand why depth perception alludes me.
My crowning act, which I am ashamed to say happens on and fairly regular basis, is when, like yesterday, I am walking beside a wall and happen to come across an open door way. BAM! my shoulder makes contact with the inside of the door frame and I am immediately stopped in my tracks.
Older adults will walk into the room, smile and say to me, "honey don't ever get old. I can't even remember why I came in this room." Is it bad that I'm thinking, honey, this isn't a foreign event for me. I probably do it more than you do.
So if anyone would like council on what it's like to get old, please don't hesitate to call. I'm a trained professional AND I'm ahead of my time.
1 comment:
I know exactly how you feel and have the bruises to show for it. Have always been this way my whole life so it's not just and old thing. At least you will laugh into old age!
LOve, mom
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